Confronting Mr. Big Butt

Have you guys met my husband yet? Not officially? Well let me introduce you:

Internets this is Jason.

Jason this is the internets.

Jason is pretty cool. He also can be a pain in my ass.


He does things like love me (Even Pre-Boob Job):



He also loves me when I look like this:



Which strangely, I do a lot.

He does things like this:



And like this:



And unfortunately like this too:



He gave me this:



Which also unfortunately looks like this sometimes:



The good thing is together? They look like this:



Which is fucking awesome!

What is not fucking awesome is that when I get older he makes me do things like this:



And then there are nights like last night when no matter how much I tell him not to do it. No matter how hard I try to hide his phone. He does things like call this guy and call him out on telling his wife that she has a large ass.

And I quote "Dude, there are things you don't do with women. You don't talk about their kids and you don't talk about their bodies. Learn that. Square it up next time you see her, man."

Yeah, it's hard to get mad at that but still. See if I tell him when someone tells me I have a fat ass again!

Love you, Jason.


EDITED: PS. It's his gene pool that makes things like this happen: