Updated: Me Or Dooce, You Choose...

So I always said if I was up for one of these awards I would probably not say a word and lose gracefully, drunk and with little or no dignity.

But then I found out that someone nominated me and then I saw that I was up against Dooce. And not only that but seriously? Dooce only has 73 votes at this moment.

And really? I'm hotter than Dooce right? I mean, I'm not hotter than Guy Kawasaki, but Dooce is pregnant. I'm totally not pregnant. And if Guy Kawasaki is pregnant, vote for him. Except that he's not even nominated in that category and you'd have to, you know, actually nominate him and everything and that probably seems like a lot of work for some guy who may or may not be hot and may or may not be pregnant.

Go and vote for me.

Because I might just be nominated for being hot AND for being funny. I'm also up for parenting (snort). And the thing about that is I'm sub-par in every single category. A vote for me is a vote for mediocrity.

Do it... or I'll shank you, prison yard style.

PS, I rock an orange jumpsuit. Word.

On second thought? Don't vote for me... This is the most unattractive thing I've ever done.

And on third thought? I know you're going to be all lazy and whine about the fact that there is a registration form involved, ahem. And I get it, I really do.

I wouldn't vote for me either.