What Am I Missing?

Updated: Please Note: If I linked you it's because you don't suck! Promise.

I read some very popular blogs. There are a few that I totally get why they are up for awards, even if I find the award itself dubious at best (I mean once you win that prestigious of an award is there anywhere but down to go? Heh.) and find myself annoyed by the amount of pandering for votes that is happening on some blogs and Twitter. I've even voted, which I've never done before and now feel kind of dirty about doing. Not that feeling dirty is always a bad thing but I imagine that this must be how most of the people with Palin stickers still on their car must feel or this guy.

Lately I find myself cruising around blogville looking for some fresh reads. I can't explain why I've never been drawn to reading some of the more popular blogs. Well let me correct that, because I can totally explain it now that I've given it a shot.

Dude, they suck (please note I'm at least classy enough to not link to the suckage). And the more I dig into the blogs that are all linked together the more I find the incestuous nature of them to be very reflective of the high school social scene. And seriously? There is one blog in particular that is so dry and hokey that I'm pretty sure this blogger is skating by on his looks alone and the fact that he is just sensitive enough to be a dad who writes about being a dad. Big deal.

I kept reading other bloggers writing about the "high school" scene of blogging and how shallow it was and I'll have to be honest, I just didn't get it. I realize it was because I was reading some awesome blogs that I don't even need to link because trust me, these girls know I think they are awesome. They aren't popular which is why I'm not linking to them because, man, I just said you aren't popular, but they are real and honest and funny.

I went so far as to try to read one blog that was up for an award, I even subscribed to it because, seriously, could that many people be wrong? And the answer is a solid yes, they can be, which entirely describes our previous two presidential elections. I read this person write annoyingly in fictional third person and thought I'd scratch my bleeding eyes right out of my head. I couldn't unsubscribe fast enough.

Now you can say I'm just bitter, but that's not the case (I am a little bitter about the fact that I'm sitting here listening to an odd coffee house version of TLC's Don't Go Chasing Waterfalls). I'm not even a blip on these people's radar which is why I have the gonads to write this. What I am is not bitter but disillusioned and I now understand why so many people detest the "mommy blogger". The mommy blogger is fine. The super popular, talentless mommy/daddy blogger is just farking annoying. It's like the captain of the football team or cheerleading squad can write about how their little one drooled and crapped themselves today and the world falls at their feet. But if I wrote about how I drooled and crapped myself I'd get nothing more than a collective, warranted "ewwww". And granted, I write about the very same things and I read a lot of people that also write about these same things, but! They do it well and they are funny, so freaking funny! I may not do it well or even be funny, but I at least have enough self-awareness to know what the deal is. I'm not kidding myself.

So what is my point? Well, I have no point, I'm just sorely disappointed and fully aware that popular bloggers don't rock out with their cock out so much as they suck out with their luck out. Or something.

I guess I'm just calling it what it is. LAME.