Sunday, May 3, 2009

Is There Such A Thing As Zombie Slop, You Know, Like PIg Food?

Mr. Booms and I have always been "anti-gun" when it comes to keeping one in the house. I have many reasons including a kid accidentally killing himself when I was in school with his father's gun, and my brother finding my dad's and shooting a hole in their box springs.

Jason and I have been on the same page until yesterday:

Jason: I'm thinking maybe we should a gun for the house and keep it someplace like the attic.

Me: What? No, absolutely not.

Jason: What if we need to protect ourselves?

Me: We can get one after the kids have moved out.

Jason: Pssshaw. Why get one then? The only person left to protect would be you.

Me: True, I see your loving point. You know, now that I think about it, we should have one in case of zombie infiltration.

Jason: A handgun is going to nothing in case of zombies, honey.

Me: So not true. You aim for the head. Always aim for the head.

Jason: Yeah right, totally not going to work.

Me: Seriously? You're going to tell me how to kill zombies? I think I'm just a little more educated in this area.

Jason: Whatever.

Me: That's it, when they come you are toast. Zombie toast. I'm tossing you in while I aim for their heads.

Chances are I probably won't, but let's not tell him that just yet.

Also? I had a conversation with my 9 year old who asked me questions regarding "the period" and "the puberty".



Blues said...

Oh boy. I wanna hear the period story.

Dirty Pirate Hooker said...

Here's my question to Mr. Booms: what fucking good is a gun going to do you in the attic? If you need it for protection, do you really think it will serve you best in the attic?

Logical Libby said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Logical Libby said...

Tell your husband he can get a crossbow. It looks cooler, could possibly kill up to four zombies at once (aiming for the head, if they are walking in straight lines as they are prone to do), and it less likely anyone will hurt themselves with it, since no one knows how to use them.

Miss Yvonne said...

I always wondered what good a gun was gonna do if it's hidden away somewhere like the attic or the basement and it's not loaded. I guess the IDEA of the gun is enough? Like you'd be all "Hey robber, I totally have a gun somewhere in the house and I'm totally gonna use it on you once I find the bullets" and then the robber would be all "fuck this shit" and run away.

Mongoliangirl said...

'The Period', 'The Puberty', guns, zombie slop and pig food. Betsey? You freak me straight the fuck out.
And I love it.

formerly fun said...

Best way to kill zombies? Shovel(the Lobotomizer)or flamethrower.

Rassles said...

You guys need to get a sword. Blades don't need reloading.

The Black Hole said...

the puberty is what started me off in life.

rachie! said...

We've got multiple guns in our house (we each have 3, and then one more that my uncle made that needs some work). We are already talking about how to best deal with the situation and kids. (Yes, i'm a hillbilly and my husband is a Texan).

If ya'll do ever decide to get a gun, get a safety lock. They thread through the trigger and down the barrel and lock with a key, or sometimes a combination.