Friday, August 8, 2008

Inadequacy At It's Best

Does inadequacy have a best?

There are dishes in my dishwasher and dishes in my sink. That in itself makes my skin crawl. I hate it. On top of that, my house wifing skills showed an all time low when Jason woke up this morning to discover he had no clean boxers. I do recall asking him he'd rather I did laundry last night instead of drinking that second beer and he laughed at me.

I offered to smell all of his boxers to tell him which ones were the least offensive. He told me that he wouldn't wish that fate on anyone. I'm pretty sure I was kidding but you never know what you'd do for love until you're faced with that battle.

I feel bad. My hubs shouldn't have to go commando or risk second day wear. Typically he has underwear. It might not always be folded up in his drawer but he has them.

And just so I can feel woefully not up to par, his ex-girlfriend sent a friend request on MySpace yesterday. The girl has had a second kid and she's skinnier than I ever realized she might have been before. If she stumbles upon this - Bitch, you look good.

I wonder if she'd make sure he has clean underwear.

It doesn't matter, his cat pissed on her once.

8 comments:

J said...

HAHAHAHHAHAHAAA that shit was funny.

You know you are a good wife. I mean, yeah underwear are cool, but not having any doesn't mean you suck.

Really.

KaritaG said...

What J said. If it makes you feel any better, I have no idea if my hubs ever has clean underwear. He does his laundry, I do mine. It's worked out well for us...or for me, anyway.

Captain Steve said...

If you feel truly bad, you could always offer to let him borrow your boyshorts.

Lara said...

My hub seems to think it's my job to make sure he has clean clothing and that I should know just what he's running short on at any particular point in time.

So, if it helps, we could trade, and then my hub could make you feel inadequate, then when we trade back, you'd know just how awesome you really are. :)

Dirty Pirate Hooker said...

LOL, his cat peed on her? Nice.

Don't feel bad...sometimes I wash the punk's underwear in the sink...and she's only a child!

rubyredruca said...

That's so funny! I'm pretty good with the laundry, but every other part of the cleaning seem to fail at. Rick's free-balled it a few times though. Buy him a couple more pairs of boxers, then you can cheat for a few more days on the laundry like I do!

ajillofalltrades said...

I discovered that my ex married his long-time "best friend": the same one I was suspicious of when he and I were together. (It was a long distance relationship).

Lily's Mommy said...

For the record, my sink always has dirty dishes in it. Mostly because, just when I think I've caught up, my husband brings out a biological experiment he's been hiding under his desk. What is it with men?

I am also, not all that into cleaning up. Oh, I try, but fuck it if my husband can't pick up his own underwear. Fortunately, for me, I have a cat that pees on dirty laundry left on the floor....

I might be a little cranky today. Oh yeah, I guess in a show of solidarity with the aforementioned cat, my daughter took off her diaper and then whizzed on the living room carpet today.

sigh