Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Tough Love

Tough love is one of those things that people can't always agree on. When it's happening to you, it feels so very harsh. When you're dishing it out, it can be difficult and you wonder if you are truly helping someone out.

Jason and I have a family member that is going through an incredibly tough time right now. There are nights when I know this person is lonely and questioning the decision they made. And there are days where they are angry and hating the world around them or the one they perceive as causing them pain.

Hearing of their struggle is so incredibly hard and I wish I could take my experience and roll it up into a little care package, complete with pretty paper, floppy ribbon and a glittery card and place it inside their soul to let them know that it will get better. I can't. I can talk to them and give them advice that may or may not be used. I can say that I understand but that won't fill in the pothole in this person's gut.

It just won't.

It's one of those situations that we are all aware of where we suffer from terminal uniqueness. We don't take the time to think that others go through this and know the pain and the loneliness. The dark, empty nights. The waking to no one being there in your quiet home that doesn't feel like home anymore.

I wish I could open my home, my doors and my little family life up to this person and make it all better. To let my family hold them while they hurt and heal.

I can't.

All I can say is that I do understand and the dark days will become bright again.

This? I promise.


KaritaG said...

"terminal uniqueness..."

perfect choice of words.

isn't it somewhat ironic how we all work so hard to "avoid" pain (when we can't, ultimately) while our friends and family all work so hard to "help" with the pain (even though they can't either, ultimately - they can just support us while we do it ourselves).

human nature I suppose? you are a good friend, at least, for trying to help.

Dirty Pirate Hooker said...

This just proves how amazing of a person you are, Tits McGee!

But just being there as a shoulder to lean on will be enough I'm sure.